I want to go back to Brisbane.
But do I dare?
Do I dare pack my bag, steal some money, And then return to happiness for that short, short while?
Can I sit there with so much emotions, so much confusion, so much discomfort, so much anxiety, so much fear...
So many years of my life wasted away because of my cowardness.
Its stupid, yes - because in the end, I'll end up back here anyhow.
I'll end up disappointing my mum.
I'll end up confusing everyone.
I'll end up making everyone think I'm so so indecisive.
I'll end up making Bella feel more lonely.
I'll end up in a worse position.
But, I want so much just to do something. I want to break out, and feel like I actually have a choice.
Because being held against your freedom is a horrible feeling.
And being too much of a coward to do anything about it...
feels worse.